Month 10

Ellie is 10 months old!!! Where is the time going?!? I'm so glad to say we are still going strong with breastfeeding. Happy Breastfeeding Week (or month!)!!

This may have been the hardest month of our life. We spent the entire time without Dada. Our family was definitely incomplete.

Ellie spent the first few hours at the beginning of the month on a crowded plane headed to Texas.( I'm so thankful there are still kind people in the world. I was offered help both with boarding and unloading with each destination). I also personally lugged around Ellie (about 21 lbs), a cooler of 90 oz of frozen breast milk, diaper bag, purse, and a loaded down back pack....all through the airport, by myself. 

Fun fact about our 9 hour overnight trip: Ellie slept maybe 1.5 hours. Maybe.

Did you say nightmare? 

I thought so.

 This girl is a social butterfly!! There were too many people to see and talk to. 

We have finally acclimated to Texas from Alaska, both to time and weather. Also, E now let's me out of her sight, and, gasp!, let others hold her as well. Such a relief.

Anywho, we aren't able to take the same pictures we normally do, since all of our stuff is packed, but I do have pictures. 

First time going swimming.

I'm guessing Ellie is roughly 22 pounds and getting taller by the day. She is finally saying "mama", "hi" and "dog". We have also taught her how to sign "more", which is much better than high pitched screaming. Her absolute favorite time is eating, followed by bath time. I think she purposely goes all out crazy eating so she can get in the bath tub!

She loves hearing songs and music, which makes her clap and bounce up and down. And her new BFF for life lights up her day. She loves spending time with her cousin, Brooklyn.

Until next month....

Ellie's 1/2 Birthday!

Wow. I seriously can't believe my angel is already SIX months old! Growing like a weed, she weighs in at 17 lbs 14 oz and is 26.5 inches long. Her front bottom two teeth have made their debut and she loves gumming everything. She also eats anything in sight, including attempts at her bibs and socks. Favorite foods are: sweet potatoes, carrots, apples and bananas. But momma trumps all.

Six months of successful breastfeeding, quite a feat in itself.  

There is so much now she is able to do. She is sitting unassisted (but still likes to nose dive occasionally), saying da-da-da-da, and giggling all day and night. She has the sweetest personality! 

This is one of my favorite pictures. It was taken at her 6 mo check up with Cathy Stange, her pediatric nurse practitioner. Ellie loved her hair! Cathy not only has provided her care since birth, but is also one of my greatest role models and mentors. She has inspired me to continue my education to become a pediatric nurse practitioner as well. 

Three Months Down.

Three. Months. Old. 

I should be returning to work, but that's not as easy as it sounds. When I was sent home on light duty at 28 weeks pregnant, I was itching to go back to work. Now, the thought of being separated from Ellie was just overwhelming. I just couldn't do it. So, Jerry and I discussed the pros & cons of returning to work this early, and decided it was best to stay home. 

Ellie is approximately 15 pounds based on our home scale. She is starting to enjoy tummy time (as compared to the screaming fits and leg kicking she used to exhibit). She is starting to give big, toothless grins more often. Sleeping more through the night. Learning to sit up in our Bumbo. 

Three months of successful breastfeeding. What does that mean? It means I deserve the Bronze Boob award. Apparently, my next award is at six months and is silver. Regardless, these are made-up achievements. But after all of the struggle and sacrifice, a bronze award sounds pretty cool right now.

Oh, I also started babywearing. This may have been started last month, but I'm not sure. The K'Tan is super easy to use, and was great for around the house chores. We upgraded to the Ergo and loved it for grocery shopping! Ellie was obviously very comfortable...she was asleep within minutes and slept throughout the trip. 

Parenting is definitely a learn-as-you-go. Babies cry. A lot. Eventually you learn what each cry means. If after eating, clean diapering, etc. and Ellie was still upset, Dad could always do the trick.

This month, we got to meet Santa and open presents. Jerry and I were both grinches and did not set up a tree or hang lights. I did put up a few decorations, including stockings, but other than that...nada. Thankfully, Ellie doesn't know the difference and her next Christmas we will be home with family and it will be like she never missed anything. Here are our Christmas pictures. Santa was so excited he was able to hold her! 

Our Christmas dress that Lulu sent us! 

A true Alaskan Santa. Complete with the Fur Boots. 

It's hard being a little one. Cloth diapers and baby legs, the best around the house outfit. 

Two Month Victories

Two months old, and my has she changed! She is up 3 lbs 6.5 oz from birth, all from breastfeeding! Seriously, this is probably more of a mom accomplishment. She loves to eat, watch TV or look at bright lights, swinging in her swing...and most of all, mommy! 

To go on top of the breastfeeding accomplishment, Ellie finally learned to latch without using a nipple shield. Nipple shields are, for lack of better words, a pain in the butt. I had to clean them after every feeding, which was still every 1-2 hours. Then, when Ellie was hungry, it was always this scramble to find one that was close, or wash it quickly before she went into full-blown meltdown. Needless to say, the transition was heaven. No more nipple shields. I'm too nervous to throw them away though. Just in case. 

I would have to say, our biggest issue these first two months was definitely the never-ending diaper rash! She has had one documented since three days old. Pampers Sensitive caused a chemical burn. So we switched to Huggies Sensitive. She continued to have this nasty raw, blistery rash. I felt awful. We spent tons on diapers, creams, prescription ointments..I even went as far as to eliminate dairy from my diet to help; and that was probably the most difficult thing to do. Dairy is in everything. Finally, we gave in and tried this weird suggestion of cloth diapers. These helped tremendously! And they aren't as bad as everyone thinks. 1) Breastfed baby poop is water soluble, so it washes out easy peasy. 2) No blow outs (which Ellie is infamous for). 3) Money saver. PLUS 4) They have super cute prints.

Another not-so-fun issue: baby acne coupled with heat rash. My sweet girl looked awful. And apparently, this is normal. But no one warns you about it. Heat rash is very common, especially with breastfeeding. So there's your heads up. 

Unfortunately, living away from family, we miss all of the holidays. Our Thanksgiving was spent Facetiming with family (a blessing to have that technology) and individual pictures were taken of us holding Ellie. She was wearing an outfit that Lulu sent for her. 

Ellie and Daddy. Twins. 

And that was the gist of our first two months. Diaper rashes and baby acne. But beyond that, lots of loving and cuddles. I miss her being this tiny already.

Life With A Newborn

I want to start off by saying that having a baby is no walk in the park. (Anyone that tells you differently is lying). I am simply amazed that I was able to do what I did, and survive. It is empowering to know what you can do as a woman and as a mother. The beauty is, after all of that hard work, you have this sweet baby. And  just like that, you are overwhelmed with love and forget all of the horrendous stuff that happened. 

Ellie's first week of life, I had back-up. Lulu (otherwise known as my mom) was here. She helped me with sleeping at night, calming Ellie down when I just couldn't figure it out, making meals, etc. Seriously, she was a blessing. But, unfortunately, she had to leave...and my heart broke. She knew exactly what to do, yet I could barely get through the day. It does take a village to raise a child, and my village was leaving! 

So, back to reality.  Lulu is gone. I was overwhelmed. It was Jerry, Ellie and then whatever was left of my sanity. It's no joke that newborns are exhausting. They are. And that whole "sleep when they sleep".... right. Because then you still have to take care of yourself, make meals, keep the house clean, etc. 

On top of all that, no-one really tells you how hard it is to recover from having a baby. It's awful. It's gross. And then throw baby blues on top of that. I still can't believe we survived. 

We adjusted to this new lifestyle. It wasn't just "us" anymore. We couldn't just drop everything and go out. In our case, we couldn't just drop her off with the grandparents. We are essentially alone here in Alaska. As I'm writing this, we have yet to have a date night, and Ellie is almost 5 months old.

But with all the not-so-fun, crazy, sleepless days and nights....there's this beautiful side to being a parent. This perfect, resilient little person....is yours. And you learn a lot. Quickly. We've learned that no matter how much we prepared, how many books we read, or how many items we bought...nothing really mattered. Ellie decided what she liked and that was it. We bought a bathtub seat. She showers with us. Bassinet. She sleeps with us. Her nursery and all of it's glory. It's used as a room to change her diaper. That's it. You get the picture. 

Even though I may have felt like giving up, I'm so glad I didn't. Life means so much more now. A simple smile makes my whole day.